14 reasons why Buzzfeed should hire me as their Australian editor (featuring Cats)

Most covering letters are boring, and this one’s no exception. But it DOES come illustrated with pictures of cats, so that’s something, right?

Hi, Buzzfeed. I figured this would be slightly more interesting than the other covering letters that you received for this job offer, so, fingers crossed eh?

1. I’m a pretty good writer. This kitten’s just read one of my articles about games, and that’s made him happy. Maybe the kitten doesn’t really care so much about games! That’s okay. I make my copy as approachable as possible, where appropriate. That’s a big concern of mine. (via CanadaPetGrooming)

2. This kitten is thinking about the time that he read one of my stupid articles on FHM. I worked for FHM for a year and handled the majority of their web content. Some of my articles were about board games. Or buttons. Or how to kiss. (via fanpop)

3. This kitten is tired, and it symbolises the huge amounts of work that I did largely unsupervised at FHM. I turned out lots (and lots!) of barely-relevant copy focused around pictures of women in bikinis! Or hot pants. Or bras. Basically women not wearing standard-issue trousers, that was the gig. (via photobucket)

4. This kitten remembers the day that I ran out of acceptable synonyms for “breasts,” three weeks into my employment. It was a sad day. (via catster)

5. This kitten represents the fact that I’m aware you’ve seen applications like this before – maybe hundreds of them! – but I’m not going to let that stop me. I’m comfortable with this. As comfortable as this kitten is in this shoe. Yeahhhhh. (via tehcute)

6. This cat is all about that kitten, much like I am. In that I like cats, pictures of cute animals, that sort of thing. But what do I want for that, a medal? “Liking pictures of cute cats” is not a CV-worthy skill. (via uproxx)

7. This kitten is enjoying my freelance career, which has mainly focused on games. Almost entirely. Games and stupid jokes. I love games and love writing about them for a living. Maybe I love games a little too much. (via pinkninjabi)

8. I’ve written about other stuff too. This one time, I infiltrated a Mexican Wrestling school in London for a magazine article and ended up face-down on the mat with my arms and legs tied together with spare bits of my leotard. (via tumblr)

9. But I’m a keen learner! I can apply my research skills to pretty much any subject, and fool the uneducated into thinking that I know what I’m talking about. This is very much my primary skill, after writing. (via deviantart)

10. This one time, I applied for a job at Gamespot after the advertisement said that “applicants must be able to break it down Gangnam Style” by rewriting the lyrics to Gangnam Style to act as a sort of covering letter.  Gamespot retweeted it, which is nice, but they never got back to me. Their loss. Totally. (via Tumblr)

11. In my spare time, I run live-action zombie apocalypses – as if I’m preparing for a coming doom, like this kitten here. I’ve used Facebook to turn a relatively niche hobby into a 1,500-fan page, which is pretty good, because most LARPs top out at around 35 fans. Not that you’d know that. I’m into some pretty nerdy stuff. And not just like Game of Thrones nerdy, not the sort of nerdy you can talk about in the office and not get weird looks. (via blogspot)

12. (I hate boasting about my achievements; it makes me bashful, like this kitten. I’ll often go off onto tangents about my weird interests in an attempt to not look like I’m bigging myself up.  This is not a useful skill for job applications) (via critteristic)

13. These cats are interested in something – almost as interested as THE GENERAL PUBLIC is in ME! (Ugh.) I love Twitter almost as much as I love tenuous links; I have a few followers, a large percentage of whom (around 30% if I’m honest) are off the back of a single article I wrote on my blog where I failed to understand what a Toughpad was because I was too hungover to think. (via blogspot)

14. But above all, I like making people laugh. Doing this on an ad-hoc person-by-person basis was proving inefficient, so branching out to a major site like Buzzfeed would be much easier than telling jokes door-to-door. Here is my CV, which is marginally more serious than this “covering letter,” and contains no pictures of kittens whatsoever. (via laughingsquid)